What Happens When a Loved One Crosses to Heaven
- Anne St. John
- Jan 3
- 5 min read
Many of the first questions people ask after a loss is also one of the hardest to say out loud:
Where did they go? Are they still with us? Can they still see me?
Not philosophically. Not symbolically. But actually.
When my brother died, that question stopped being abstract. It became personal, urgent, and unavoidable. What followed wasn’t a neatly packaged answer — it was a gradual unfolding of truth that challenged nearly everything I thought I knew about death. I wondered where he was now.
In Miles Away, Miles, now in Spirit form, described the transition in simple, direct language — not dramatic, not poeticized:
“I was standing in my bedroom. I was not in a scary place; I was in my own room. And I saw a light coming towards me. I looked to see two figures and recognized them immediately. My grandfather was there. He had died a few years ago. And he looked all young. I knew him, though. And I also know this sounds a bit crazy, but I also recognized my great-grandfather. It was like I was dreaming, but they looked so similar that I started to say, wait, what did just happen? I looked around the room again and saw my body on the floor.”
That description matters because it removes fear from the equation. Miles died by a self inflicted gunshot, but he was hardly aware of what happened or his transition.
Passing Over Is Not What Movies Show You
Many people imagine death as a moment of judgment, confusion, or punishment. What I witnessed instead — through lived experience and Spirit communication — was recognition.
Passing over is not about being evaluated. It’s about becoming aware.
Another line from Miles Away reframes the thoughts about his body in the casket clearly:
“I was not in there anyway.”
This is one of the most important truths Spirit taught me.
Your spirit is the soul in your personality. It destroys the love of money, children's ideals, fairytales, and any other childish notions that you don't understand. What is replacing those notions, are the life of a Spirit, which is more about the long term understanding of Heaven's learning to become more elevated, and learning not to judge is part of that equation. My brother's life was not a horror story, but leaving it early made his hours in Heaven feel like a living hell. (but not literal Hell). Mostly, because of what he witnessed us go through from his sad self inflicted departure.
Consciousness Does Not Collapse at Death
What continues after death is not a vague essence. It is awareness, memory, identity, and relationship.
The personality remains. The humor remains. The emotional imprint remains.
What doesn’t remain is the limitation of the physical body.
This is why people often feel their loved ones close after death — not because they are trapped, but because proximity no longer works the way it does here.
Imagine being anywhere in an instant. Being a soul means to travel to anywhere within limits. You may not just randomly jump into the shower with a friend's girlfriend. But you can visit them in the room where they were about to make out. Until you feel the sense that this is too much to bear.
Heaven Is Not Distance — It’s Release
One of the most misunderstood ideas about Heaven is that it is far away.
Spirit shows it differently. Heaven is as close as a thought away. The guides can call you home at any time. You may get to disagree, or you may get a second chance. But overall, you have a life plan. And once completed, you are told it is Time.
Heaven's time is not subject to the hour or the way we view the calendar year as much as you may think. We see that in the movies, not in Heaven. For example, the moving of a soul through a new lifetime can take up to three earth years if that soul were to want a second chance. But that does not mean that it is unfathomable that they remain the same way in this world as they once did while on the earth. This is a Heaven time, and not subject to the state of control that the moon and the sun have over our planet.
Once the soul is a state of consciousness where pain, confusion, and emotional constriction loosen their grip over the body, the mind and the soul merge as one. This happens in an instant. Life is like getting a full upgrade to your mind in Spirit. You learn beyond your Heavenly years.
That doesn’t mean everything is instantly resolved. It means the soul finally has room to breathe.
What About Fear, Guilt, or “Unfinished Business”?
This is where honesty matters.
Passing Over does not erase responsibility or emotional awareness. Souls remain conscious of the lives they lived and the impact they had.
But awareness does not equal punishment.
It equals understanding.
And understanding is the beginning of healing — on both sides.
My brother started off trying to find the heart to finish his Life Review. This took time. He was in a shambles attempting to remember the life that he had. But he was too afraid to finish it after taking the gun to his head. He was not given the memories the way we would have them here. He was given a learner's permit to see more when he was ready. God would have given him all of it in an instant had He felt that Miles would be okay. However, the Life review is a good thing and is helpful in the way that the guides place it all in sequence. From start to finish the guides give you the best case scenario for your own projects, and the learning that you have in that life. That makes a huge difference on the Other Side.
What This Means for the Living
When someone you love crosses, the relationship doesn’t disappear.It changes form.
Grief often comes from believing the bond has been severed. Mediumship teaches that it hasn’t — it has simply moved beyond physical interaction.
That doesn’t mean you should rush yourself into belief. It means you’re allowed to question without fear. Your loved ones are likely to have the Life Review in about an hour of your time after their passing. In that time, they can feel your feelings, thoughts are just as good as words, and you can figure out who was in your corner and who was not.
A Grounded Closing Thought
If you are wondering where your loved one is, consider this:
They are not lost. They are not trapped. They are not reduced to memory.
They are conscious, aware, and still connected, just as much if not more than always before — just no longer limited by a body.
And that understanding, over time, can change how grief carries itself in your life.
And in my own case, can show you that your life, however tragic, or emotional, can become a Heaven in waiting. Because you have your family in Heaven to look forward to again.
Anne St. John, Heaven's Medium for grief healing
Get the book Miles Away by Psychic Medium Anne St. John for immediate download in Kindle for just $2.00 at https://a.co/d/eulUd53
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