Trauma. You know the kind of raw heartbreak that haunts you in your darkest moments? That trauma. It follows you, makes you feel unwanted, and undesirable. It curdles every success you have, until you can finally rid yourself of it. But how do you finally recover from a damaged life? This is the way.
I know that you are thinking that you are past hope. That you don't have a chance at recovering what you really wanted. It was like watching the rainfall and seeing it catch fire to everything that you held close to you. Your honor, your dreams, and your plans either completely wiped out or tainted by the choices that you made, someone else's choices, or by the circumstances that arose in your life. And you are left in the aftermath, looking at years of what you had, and what you still need, and are in no way of ever getting even close to fixing this terrible situation that you are now in. Sound familiar? Read on.
First, understand that you are not alone. No one is perfect. Attempting to see yourself as the success story that you wish you had become is the same as telling yourself that you could have and should have been far better at knowing things before it happened to you. And you are not alone. Many people think this way. But isn't it time that you let yourself off the hook? Aren't you being a little too hard on yourself? After all, you are not in control of the Universe, and comparing your journey to anyone else is the same as deleting the perfectly matched obstacle course of Life that has been tailor made to fit your personality and your soul. Just think for a minute. If you are on this planet to learn, then only the best and bravest are given the high honors of overcoming greatly damaging factors that are land mined throughout their life. You are not a weak soul. And you will survive this lesson. And once you do, you will be free of a lot of the poison that we inherit, and are given that block us from becoming our higher selves. You will become free of all of the burdens that you have been carrying with you and seeing yourself in a new Light. That may help see the reason why you are going through this, but realize that you still need to see the how to move forward and get out of this stage.
Feeling stuck in your situation is not going to get you into any better shape by curling up on the floor like a roly-poly bug. And I am not a psychologist or have any kind of doctorate in psychology, but from what I have learned in my life and from what Spirit has taught me, you need to make a plan. Ready to get out of this situation, and start to live happy again? Here are the steps that can help you.
First, stop judging yourself. You are a soul that is made of Light, and of Love. You are meant to be in that centered healthy Universe. If you choose to view only darkness, then you will remain in the dark. Start by taking an accounting of what is going right. Don't overlook what you may be taking for granted. Your parents, your children, your spouse or your friends, your job, your health, your faith. Each are in your life (or are lacking at this point) for a reason. And that reason is of good service to you for now. Perspective. It is wise to see it in the positive, and to remember that you are on a journey, just as each person that surrounds you is on a journey as well. You cannot control their journey, you can only control your own.
Second, let's look at what is harming you. Find a notebook. Pick one that is perfect for you, a leather bound, or canvas, or simple paper journal that you can find in any Barnes & Noble, Amazon, or Dollar Store. It doesn't matter but dedicate this journal to your healing journey. And start to write out the list of what you don't like in your life. Do you hate where you live? Do you want to be more active socially? Do you want to make more money? Do you want to have more time with your family? Do you need to find love again? Whatever the problems that you see are, write them down in a list. Small, large, and even the wishful thinking, keep writing to get all of them on paper. And then take a look at the topics. Look at the ones that can be easily fixed. Perhaps a phone call can solve one, or maybe some will take some research to repair. But each of them has a solution. Even the fact that someone is gone to Heaven. That evolved person is still alive and is still connected to you in many ways. See the positive. See the soul - utions.
Third, you need to have goals. The science in this is easy. You will need to have a direction to aim towards. If you cannot define the problems, then you cannot find the solutions. If you cannot see the solutions then you cannot set your course towards them either. Finding out what you really want is half the battle. Once you can say that you have goals, then you can start picturing the goals as reality. What is it going to be like to live in that way, when you have the things that you want? And are you willing to give up anything that you think you need, to get to the better life that you have planned in your mind. Write it down in that journal. Like a guidemap, it will lead you to where you need to go. In many ways you may be planning to make major life changes that you did not consider before. But you have to reconcile your life with your self happiness to get rid of the obstacles that are in the way right now. Maybe it will take time because of your circumstances. But with planning and time you can find your own way to a happier place and more fulfillment than what you have now. That is a goal. And a way to see that your life will get better, as you steer for that shoreline,
"Write it down in that journal. Like a guidemap, it will lead you to where you need to go."
Go through each day writing down the positives and the new beginnings. If something fails, don't worry, it was just one try that did not make the final cut. Once you can write off the bad, you find out what really works for you. Keep track of the successes and the failures, because those failures are also directing you away and towards the path that is ultimately meant to bring you the most joy. See the past you as that child that could not understand what to do then. You would not harm a child that was just learning. So, don't harm your younger self by saying that you should have known it all before it happened. Forgiveness is meant to help you let go of all the emotional baggage and harm that came to you. Your family and your friends may have had it much harder than your think, and you may have been in the wake of the destruction that befell them. But don't harm yourself anymore by thinking that it was a personal act of treason against you. Their lives were not perfect either. Maybe they made worse mistakes, But can you blame everyone for not knowing what would occur afterwards? Take a chance and forgive them for the worst, and if you can't then live happily in spite of what they did. And leave the rest for God to sort out later. Remember, your life is not over at death of the body, that is only when your new life begins.
Lastly, learn from it all. How is the then attributing to the now? What is in your past that is telling you to move forward or change something in your future. Think of why you chose what you did. When and where do you see the patterns of why you chose this way? And then pull it all together and see what is really at the core. Did you need to understand the overall value of what you are learning to see a better outcome in the future. Direct your spending, or your attention to the things that will make you the most happy, and keep moving forward. You have new goals, hopefully, new perspectives and now, you can move past the tragic, the pain, and the depression of the damage that happened in your life. Now, you can move in a more productive and positive direction by seeing that all things - the good and the bad, were made to bring you to a new life, a happier version of you. Healed from the wounds and better off from the journey, you can make it the rest of the way.
Anne St. John is an Author and Psychic Medium. She offers Intuitive Guidance and other services by appointment only at www.AnneStJohn.com